I'm Confused By It: "Mitt Romney" at Herald Square

 Okay, I didn't get a great picture of this person because he (I'm going to just assume it was a dude) wouldn't freaking stand still for longer than a millisecond, but the sign he's holding says "I AM MITT ROMNEY". So the question becomes: "B'scuze me?" Or maybe just plain old "Huh?"

Now, we all know I'm not always the sharpest tool in the tool container, but am I missing something? If this is satire, what is being satirized? Filthy rich plutocrats who secretly love wearing red spandex, look fake pregnant, and wear spooky serial killer masks? I'm confused by it.

When I first approached this person to snap a photo, he stroppily held out his hand and shook his head as if to say, "Uh-uh, you want a shot, put a dollar in the pot" or some such. When I wasn't immediately forthcoming with cash, the guy turned around so as to ruin my picture, then held up his sign toward the oncoming traffic on 34th Street, apparently hopeful that a passing car or taxicab would pony up some sweet dosh for some sort of explanation of this nonsense. This is not how capitalism works, amiright?

Or maybe it is, I don't know, I'm poor, gimme some money for writing this dumb blog post.

When Will a Journamalist Ask Weight-Loss Expert Mike Huckabee Why He’s Not Skinny Anymore?

Ok, I’m not being mean here. I’m not. It’s fine that Mike Huckabee is once again a full-figured man. More than fine. I myself would probably be the same size if I weren’t gay (gay men can’t be fat or Anderson Cooper officially disinvites us from all his hot tub parties that we were never invited to) because my favorite food group is the fried one. But the thing is, back in 2007 Mike Huckabee wrote a book, see, about how he lost weight and how we all should, too, because we are a country of fat slobs, but he isn’t anymore, so book deal pls. Inspiring!

It’s great when people use their life experience to help others/generate selfless profit. (I myself have been unsuccessfully attempting the same maneuver.) But here’s the thing: is it not kind of irritating that this guy—who spends his days getting paid lots of money to behave like a school marm criticizing our culture for producing/tolerating evil pregnant Natalie Portman and electing a man to the presidency who had the unmitigated temerity to have a Kenyan father that was alive during the incredibly relevant Mau Mau Revolution—failed utterly at one thing that he once lectured us over in a 176-page book? Irritating? Kind of? Yes?

Because Mike Huckabee, as Judd Nelson in The Breakfast Club might put it, is once again pushing maximum density. His face is now taking up pretty much the entire front cover of whatever dumb book he’s promoting now. The book is about small, simple government or some shit. So are we to expect that in a few years time Mike Huckabee will be abandoning this particular fight and giving out government checks at his Fox News studio to an audience of socialist welfare queens with Oscars for Best Actress?

The answer is chicken. Fried chicken.

And biscuits.

I'm Confused By It

Like all of you, I think that Rachel Maddow is at her funniest when she's not trying to be funny. When she does her little high-concept skits she can be quite tedious and grating (especially if that godawful ginger sidekick is involved), but when she's just reacting to a video of someone like Sharon Angle or Pat Buchanan or Sarah Palin saying something retarded (sorry, Trig) by saying "hmmm" in that high-pitched, incredulous tone, she totally earns her comedy stripes.

But there's something I've been noticing on her show recently that isn't funny "ha ha" but funny weird, and I need to know if I'm supposed to laugh. So Rachel will be doing an interview, like the one shown in the above screengrab with smoking hot Ezra Klein of the Washington Post, and the interviewee will be talking to her from within a teevee screen (beamed in from Tattooine or wherever). Then, there will be a split screen so you can see both of them talking from within teevee screens, like this:



But then there will be a switcheroo and all of a sudden you'll be looking at smokin' hot Ezra or whoever at a desk talking to Rachel, who is now trapped in a teevee screen. I thought Ezra was on Tattooine!



So my question is: wtf? Weird, amiright? Why aren't they sitting in the same room? I never do interviews with someone via television screen when they're just sitting on a stool in my kitchen. Why should Rachel? And this wasn't just a one-off. I saw it last week, too, but at the time I thought maybe I was just seeing things after too many vodka 'n Diet Cherry 7-Ups. But I hadn't had any this morning (well, only one), so this is a real thing. Is it just a new cable news convention that I don't understand, like Sarah Palin being interviewed on Fox about anything?

Answers, pls.