Wednesday, April 15

Bitchez Caught on Tape

So, everyone on the planet has now seen the youtube of Susan Boyle singing her heart out on Britain's Got Talent. (If you haven't, ask your mom about it because I guarantee she will have seen it and posted it on her Facebook.) Anyway, so Susan is going to be the Next British Sadsack Who Melts the Heart of the World (following in the footsteps of Paul Potts), and that's just fine because I love this woman and her giant eyebrows and her cat Pebbles so much.

But you know who I really want to hear from? The unfortunate lass in the above screen grab who was unlucky enough to have her bitchy dismissive eye roll captured on film when Susan came on stage and announced that she wanted to be a professional singer. The entire crowd was geared up to chew Susan up and spit her out, but this sad girl was chosen by the camera man to represent the seething audience's readiness to pounce. And now Susan Doyle is a household name and this girl has been seen oh around 16 million times on youtube rolling her eyes with disdain for the new Underdog Hero of the World. That's sad. Because, really, it could have been anyone in that audience.

That's right, there were lots of bitches in that audience. Lots of mean, dreary bitches who are probably perfectly nice when they're not sitting in a giant room together hungering for the opportunity to collectively laugh at someone's dreams. But the cameraman could only choose one bitch for this particular shot, and he chose that bitch, poor thing. I feel for her. It reminds me of the time I was mouthing the words "I hate you so f**king much" to my high school girlfriend while she was checking her makeup and she looked over and busted me. I mean, it could have been anyone in that room that got busted. We were all doing it.